Most believe yodeling originated in Switzerland. |
Well here's what really happened.....
Many years ago a man was traveling through the mountains of Switzerland. Nightfall was rapidly approaching and he had nowhere to sleep. He went up to a farmhouse and asked the farmer if he could spend the night. The farmer told him that he could sleep
in the barn.
As the story goes, the farmer's daughter came down from upstairs and asked her father, "Who's that man going into the barn?"
"That's some fellow traveling through," said the farmer. "He needs a place to stay for the night, so I said he could sleep in the barn."
The daughter said, "Perhaps he's hungry." So she prepared him a plate of food and took it out to the barn.
About an hour later, the daughter returned, her
clothing disheveled and straw in her hair. Straight up to bed she went.
The farmer's wife was very observant. She then suggested that perhaps the man was thirsty. So she fetched a bottle of wine, took it out to the barn, and she too did not return for an hour. Her clothing was askew, her blouse buttoned incorrectly and her hair all messed up. She also headed straight to bed.
The next morning at sunrise the man in the barn got up and continued on his journey, waving to the farmer as he left.
When the daughter awoke and learned that the visitor was gone, she broke into tears. "How could he leave without even saying good-bye," she cried. "We made such passionate love last night!"
"What?" shouted the father as he angrily ran out of the house looking for the man who, by now, was halfway up the mountain.
The farmer screamed up at him, "I'm going to get you! You had sex with my daughter!"
The man looked back down from the mountainside, cupped his hand next to his mouth, and yelled out:
There was once a young man who, in his youth,
professed his desire to become a great writer.
When asked to define great, he said, 'I want to write
stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people
will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will
make them scream, cry, howl in pain and anger!'
He now works for Microsoft writing error messages
A sweet little girl runs out to the backyard where
her father is working and asks him, 'Daddy, what's sex?'
So, her father sits her down and tells her all about
the birds and the bees.
He tells her about conception, sexual intercourse,
sperms and eggs.
He tells her about puberty, menstruation, erections.
Then he thinks, what the hell, and goes on to tell
her the whole works, thinking that to tell it all is
the only way to tell the truth.
The girl is quite awestruck with this sudden influx
of bizarre new knowledge.
Her father finally asks, 'So what made you wish
to know about sex?'
Oh, mommy said lunch would be ready in a couple of secs...'
A Texan walks into a pub in Ireland and clears his
voice to the crowd of drinkers. He says, 'I hear you
Irish are a bunch of drunken' fools. I'll give $500
American dollars to anybody in here who can drink
10 pints of Guinness back-to-back.'
The room is quiet, and no one takes of the Texan's
offer. One man even leaves.
Thirty minutes later the same gentleman who left
shows back up and taps the Texan on the shoulder.
'Is your bet still good?' he asks.
The Texan says yes and asks the bartender to line
up 10 pints of Guinness. Immediately the Irishman
tears into all 10 of the pint glasses drinking them all
The other pub patrons cheer as the Texan sits down
in amazement. The Texan gives the Irishman the $500
and says, 'If ya don't mind my askin', where did ya'll go
for that 30 minutes you were gone?'
The Irishman replies, 'Oh...I had to go to the pub down
the street to see if I could do it first.'
Q)What do Madiline McCann and a Submarine have in common?
A)Both are full of seamen and are at the bottom of the ocean
Q)What's the difference between Madiline McCann and the Pope?
A)The Pope died a virgiin.